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Five Ways to Stay Positive in Negativity
Julie Fuimano / Monster
It All Starts with You
In what ways are you contributing to the negativity around you? Are you listening to gossip or participating in conversations where the only focus is to denigrate, diminish or criticize? Language matters. Everything you say has an impact; saying something negative not only dishonors the person you’re speaking about and the person you’re speaking with, but it also makes you feel bad even if you don’t realize it. Learn to respect people’s humanity and their right to be themselves. Complaining without end does not focus on creating solutions; rather, it perpetuates and magnifies the problem, wasting everyone’s precious time and energy.
Speak Up
Tell the other person how you feel by saying, “This doesn’t work for me.” It’s nonjudgmental, since you’re making it about you, not them. Also, people often don’t realize they are being negative. Point it out in a gentle, caring way: “Do you realize you are complaining?” Just bringing it to their attention can be enough to shift the conversation. Over time, people will learn what they can and cannot discuss with you, and it will stop being an issue. If you say nothing, your silence conveys permission to continue.
Be Constructive, Positive, Meaningful and Beneficial
What is the point or purpose of what you’re saying? Is it to hurt or help? And at the end of the conversation, is there an action step to take? Constructive conversations are empowering and leave people a little better off from having participated in them. Become the kind of person who takes your time and words seriously.
Praise and Acknowledge
It’s amazing what a few words of praise and acknowledgement can do. You want to be the kind of person people gravitate to because they know they will be uplifted by you, not put down or drained of life-sustaining energy. In short, you want people to feel good after being in your presence.
No matter what is going on around you, you control your inner environment and how you choose to respond to external events and situations. It’s your responsibility to become the kind of person you enjoy being and with whom others enjoy being around.
It takes a true leader to walk a path different from the crowd. So when others are negative, stretch your boldness muscles and be positive in spite of what others do or think. It’s the only way to create a ripple of change. And if we all do our part, then slowly but surely, we will make a difference in our work environment and the larger community.
chaser48
4 months ago
44 comments
I ignore negative people too. But that will not prevent them from approaching your boss and twisting his or her ear. This negativity has a way of evolving into Harassment and hostility in the workplace ( all on company time on top of it all) repetitious malicious targeting and predatory discrimination can all happen BECAUSE THE LEADER KNOWS but fails to bring all the parties together to talk. I have never been to a seminar where "Fixing Broken Relationships" was not included as a main segment of the workshop. Negativity is negative and a downer - without the proper leadership to recognize this and acts to catch it early - you'll find yourself in a legal suit. Defamation slander, libel all these are actionable offenses. Be prepared to go to war on your own behalf. I suggest PRE_PAID LEGAL services -- I got mine through my daughter and it really helped me.
Account Removed
6 months ago
I just ignore peoples complaints, everyone has them. It's a part of what makes us
gimmepaws
7 months ago
8 comments
"Do you realize you're complaining" does not sound positive to me, it sounds passive-aggressive.
BrassRing
7 months ago
2 comments
Excellent. I'm pleased to see an article about attitudes, human interaction and doing the right thing for the right thing.
Gossip and negativity are virtually defining traits of our species. It is an uphill battle to behave against that, though wholly worth it.
"If you wish to improve, you must be content to be thought of as foolish and stupid."
- Epicticus
Dyer_Amy
7 months ago
12 comments
Thank you for such positive and motivating thoughts. It is true that it is difficult to change how other people behave and think, but by always trying to be positive, one helps oneself. Becoming negative due to the attitudes of others, has a bad effect on one's own mental and physical health!
szafirau
7 months ago
8 comments
This is right on the money but unless supported by a HR Director who presently leads by "catching them doing something wrong", these negative to positive changes are much more difficult; near to impossible to achieve than espoused in this article.